Even the strongest of the rākṣasas couldn’t stand before him as his breath itself felt like a tornado. They tied their waists and exerted themselves for the cause. Ten thousand rākṣasa warriors shouted in unison along with various percussion instruments like drums being played! Kumbhakarṇa didn’t wake up! They brought in animals like elephants, horses, camels and donkeys, beat them up to make them trumpet, neigh, grunt and bray. With these sounds they also used a lot of other instruments to whip up a frenzy. The whole of Laṅkā resonated with these sounds. But still that mahārākṣasa didn’t wake up! The rākṣasa warriors ran out of plans. Some started plucking his hair. Some more bit his ears! They brought hundreds of pots of water and emptied them in his ears! Still it had no effect! The strongest among them brought hammers and started beating him! Still he continued to sleep! They brought in a thousand elephants and made them walk over him! Finally he felt as though someone had touched him and he got up!”
Finally he woke up!
He got up and yawned! He had no idea about what all was done to wake him up! Only realisation he had was that he was hungry! He yawned once again, it was as though a hurricane passed by! He exclaimed , “ (I’m) hungry! Hungry!” gobbled up the mountains of meat which was present, “ (I’m) thirsty!” he said and drank umpteen pots of blood and just emptied all the wine which was lying nearby.
Meanwhile all the rākṣasa warriors who were entrusted with the task of waking him up were hiding! Once he finished eating and belched they came out one by one. Kumbhakarṇa seeing them realised that these are the ones who woke him up!
He also realised why Rāvaṇa wanted him awake. “Well, I’ll kill Śrīrāma, Lakṣmaṇa, the whole army of vānaras and then I’ll go see my brother!” The rākṣasa warriors pleaded him that seeing Rāvaṇa first is more apt. “Go ask Rāvaṇa what I should do. Should I go to the battlefield directly? Or should I meet him first?” Rāvaṇa wanted him to meet him first. So Kumbhakarṇa got up from his bed, bathed and got ready. Going to war without something stimulating? He drank two thousand pots of wine before going.
When he set out on the royal highway to go to the palace, each footstep would make the ground below tremble! He was visible from outside the city walls to the vānaras! His height was 600 feet! His waist measured 3,600 feet! His weapon weighed 111 tons!
Seeing such a gargantuan form the vānaras trembled in fear! They ran helter-skelter! Some lied down pretending to be dead! Even Śrīrāma was surprised seeing Kumbhakarṇa. He called Vibhīṣaṇa and asked him, “Vibhīṣaṇa, who is the rākṣasa who is visible from here? I’d never seen such a giant in my life!” Vibhīṣaṇa narrated Kumbhakarṇa’s background and said, “Śrīrāma, the vānaras should never know that he is a rākṣasa!”
उच्यतां वानराः सर्वे यन्त्रमेतत् समुच्छ्रितम्
Yuddhakāṇḍa 61.33
[Tell them that it's a contraption, a scarecrow which has been setup]
When Kumbhakarṇa is ready to go to the battlefield, Rāvaṇa himself ties golden armlets, decorates his fingers with rings, and adorns him with necklaces! Kumbhakarṇa in the frenzy of war himself tears them and throws them around! He laughs ridiculing the rākṣasa warriors and says, “The reason for this war is Śrīrāma and Lakṣmaṇa. Let me kill them first! These forest dwelling vānaras have not harmed us in any way! These are fit to be roaming around our pleasure gardens leaping from one tree to the other!”
नापराध्यन्ति मे कामं वानरा वनचारिणः ।
जातिरस्मद्विधानां ते पुरोद्यानविभूषणम् ॥Yuddhakāṇḍa 65.44
While the rākṣasa warriors open the doors of the fort and ventured out, Kumbhakarṇa just crosses the fort walls as though it’s a small mound!
स लङ्घयित्वा प्राकारं पद्भ्यां पर्वतसन्निभः ॥
Yuddhakāṇḍa 65.53
Due to his gargantuan form, his mouth looked as though it's in the sky, when he entered the battlefield with a roar it was as though the clouds rumbled! The vānaras ran for their dear life!
His fighting style was totally different! Instead of killing the vānaras he just ate them in huge numbers! He just gulped them in hundreds as his wrath increased! Some of the vānaras would come out of his nose and ears! His fighting style has been humourously by maharṣi Vālmīki.
Even Rāvaṇa laughs! But more than humour it evokes terror! When he laughs it’s sinister! When devī Sītā wasn’t swayed by any of his offers, he was enraged. Then one of his wife called Dhānyamālinī came to him, embraced him and said, “Why bother about Sītā? Come with me! When there is no love left it only leads to fatigue but no happiness! Instead it's a joy to go with someone who is in love with you!”, she pulled him away. Rāvaṇa let out a boisterous laugh , “Ha! Ha!” and went back to his palace. (Sundarakāṇḍa 22.41,43)
A pile of black gram
While constructing similes, qualifying with adjectives, even in insignificant situations, maharṣi Vālmīki tries to bring in humour. During his search for devī Sītā, Hanumān enters the royal palace and sees Rāvaṇa sleeping on a bed worthy of his stature. The dark complexioned giant looked as though black gram was piled up! (माषराशिप्रतीकाशम्) The lamps made of gold and studded with precious gems looked as though they were staring at the beautiful women sleeping there without even blinking their eyes. Some of the lamps which were dull looked like gamblers who had just lost everything in a game of dice! Kumbhakarṇa was sleeping wearing bracelets and crown! (काञ्चनाङ्गदनद्धाङ्गं किरीटिनमरिन्दमम्) Seeing Kumbhakarṇa’s appetite for animals the creator, Brahmā, was worried that all the animals would go extinct in no time! (अचिरेणैव कालेन शून्यो लोको भविष्यति). On the banks of the lake Pampā, in the evening, the vānaras would adorn themselves using creepers as though they were garlands (विटपी माल्यधारिणः). In the Pampā, the water birds present, looked like mounds of ghee (घृतपिण्डोपमान् स्थूलान्) When Rāvaṇa and Sugrīva fought, they looked like two cats fighting for food! (मार्जाराविव भक्षार्थे)
This is the eleventh part of the multi-part translation of the Kannada book "Valmiki Munigala Hasya Pravrtti" by Mahamahopadhyaya Vidwan Dr. N Ranganatha Sharma. Thanks to Dr. Sharada Chaitra for granting us permission to translate this wonderful work. The original in Kannada can be read here
